Check out this beautiful listing from Peter He at ReMax on Morrison Road:

Last Friday we officially launched the Burlington Digest, and the wave of support that followed was incredible. By the end of that Friday we had gotten over 400 new readers coming directly from here, breaking our one day growth record.

We want to thank you all again for the continued support, and if you haven’t already told your family and friends about the coolest newsletter in town - they can subscribe here.

Today was a slow news day, so to make sure you get your daily dose of morning entertainment, we asked AI to roast every neighbourhood in Oakville.

Here are the results:

Downtown Oakville
Ah, Downtown — where a single latte costs more than parking your car illegally for an hour. If you’re not wearing Lululemon, pushing a stroller that costs more than your first car, and pretending to enjoy kale salads, are you even allowed on Lakeshore?

Bronte
Bronte is basically Oakville’s version of Muskoka: boats, boardwalks, and retirees who’ve earned the right to block the whole sidewalk while discussing pickleball injuries. Bonus points if your dog is more pampered than the average human.

Kerr Village
Kerr is Oakville’s “edgy” neighbourhood… which means there’s a tattoo shop within walking distance of a gluten-free bakery. It’s where you move if you want to tell people you’re quirky while still being a five-minute walk from Whole Foods.

Glen Abbey
Glen Abbey: where “living on the golf course” is considered a personality trait. The entire neighbourhood smells faintly of sunscreen, fresh turf, and mid-life crisis sports cars. Every dad here thinks he’s two lessons away from the PGA tour.

River Oaks / West Oak Trails
This is the land of minivans, soccer tournaments, and Costco family packs. Every cul-de-sac is a daycare, and every driveway has chalk art spelling out “Frozen 4 birthday party.” Hope you like hearing the words “travel hockey” — a lot.

Eastlake
If Oakville had royalty, they’d live here. Mansions hidden behind iron gates, backyards bigger than Bronte Harbour, and driveways long enough to host a parade. This is where you’ll find wine cellars curated better than most LCBOs — and likely a husband named Richard who “works in finance.”

Ziggy is a three-year-old neutered male Domestic Short Hair with an endless supply of energy and affection. Though he came to the shelter as a stray, he's clearly ready for a loving forever home where he can shine. You won’t find him in the regular viewing areas, but behind the scenes, he’s stealing hearts with every biscuit he kneads.

This charming kitty is full of personality, known for his playful antics and sweet habit of giving licks and the occasional love-bite. Ziggy thrives on interactive play, especially with wand toys, and is currently waiting to meet his match at the Oakville & Milton Humane Society.

Monday, September 1
☀️ Plenty of sunshine
High: 23 °C | Low: 15 °C

Tuesday, September 2
☀️ Nice with plenty of sunshine
High: 22 °C | Low: 16 °C

Wednesday, September 3
⛅ Mostly sunny and nice
High: 25 °C | Low: 16 °C